Fortune Magazine publishes an annual list of the top companies to work for, and “Great Places to Work” has its own lists as well. It is worth celebrating that companies want to make it onto such lists because it means they are paying attention to their people, benefits, and culture. But in the end, we don’t really work for companies. We work with and for people. So, if there was a national ranking of the best person to work with or work for, would we be on it? After serving over 800 clients in different sectors, here are 11 of the top traits we have found that make someone want to work with or for you.
1. Maintain a positive mood.
Moods are contagious. A leader or team member who is moody, who often moves from “What an awesome day to be alive” to “I hate this place” or a similar type of swing, can meet the qualifications of a VDP – Very Draining Person. Compare this to a leader or team member who is consistently upbeat, joyful, content, and fun. Healthy people want to work with others who lean towards authentic positivity versus grumpiness.
2. Keep quirks to a minimum.
A quirk can be defined as an odd behavior, and we all have our share (yes, you and me too!). However, it is the nature of the habit or the amount of them that a person has that can result in others not wanting to be around them. Many years ago, I was in a meeting where someone took off their shoes… right in the middle of the meeting! If you want people to work with or for you, know your quirks and manage them! And – don’t take off your shoes in the middle of a meeting.
3. Don’t be easily offended.
One characteristic that has emerged in culture is hyper-sensitivity. People are easily offended even by the most innocent or well-intentioned comments. While every leader and team member should be wise in their speech, we also should not be so easily offended. From misread compliments to questions that are misunderstood, those who are not easily offended give the benefit of the doubt and look past small offenses. This makes them less prickly and makes it more likely that others will want to work with them.
4. Practice truthful transparency.
While not everything in your thoughts or life needs to be shared with everyone, hyper-secrecy and deception ultimately weaken trust among people. There is a reason the Bible says to speak truthfully to your neighbor – truth is the foundation of relational and communal trust. Remember, people are attracted to a boss or team that models truthful transparency.
5. Be a confidential confidant.
Many years ago, we were serving a client that was dealing with a breakdown in trust. A senior-level manager was revealing confidential organizational and personnel information to a few of her team members, which was far outside the bounds of appropriate. The outcome was an erosion of trust among the team and in this leader. People want to work with and for those that respect confidentiality and keep gossip at bay.
6. Model encouragement.
In my almost 30 years of consulting and coaching, I have never once heard a staff member or a client say, “I wish my boss was more discouraging.” But I have heard hundreds of times where employees say, “I get so little encouragement from my boss.” James Kouzes and Barry Posner, authors of Encourage the Heart, note that leaders who want to encourage others do several things including saying “thank you” often and identifying the types of encouragement that are best for their team.
7. Show interest.
Someone recently told me that they invited a long-time co-worker to a party to celebrate a special occasion for a family member. This co-worker personally knew all of the family including the one to be honored. Not only did the co-worker not attend, but they also did not RSVP or send a card. That is a sad example of how to not show interest in others. People like working with or for those who genuinely care about them – their kids, their health, their work, and their dreams.
8. Offer to help.
A few years ago, our area experienced a major rainstorm that resulted in a mess. The basement of a friend’s home flooded. Boxes and boxes of saturated items. Ruined carpets. Damaged furniture. It was overwhelming, to say the least. But eight of his co-workers immediately showed up to help clear everything out. People are encouraged by those who offer to help, not just on work-related projects but in life outside of work too. And these are the kinds of people with whom others want to work.
9. Add humor.
We are fortunate to have a team here at The Center Consulting Group that loves to have fun and appreciates humor. From pranks to jokes, laughter is often present in meetings and the halls. One of our former team members was especially hilarious – her stories often resulted in smiles and laughter for everyone! Life is often hard, and work can be stressful. But a leader or team member that values humor and fun will attract others and make the emotional stress lighter.
10. Despise drama.
Office drama is often a messy combination of gossip, mood swings, conflict, and undermining. It is easy for team members to get sucked into this toxic vortex of bad behavior. It creates stress and results in staff not wanting to stay. And it is even worse in cases where a leader or a manager contributes to it! This is why people love working with those who despise such drama, resist it, and take a courageous stand against it.
11. Limit grumbling.
Unhappy with how work is being distributed. Disappointed with not being given a raise. Frustrated by not being given credit for your work. There are plenty of things for which we can complain. And let’s be honest – we have all complained about a teammate or boss at some point. But when grumbling becomes a pattern for us, it reflects an aspect of our character. And it can be draining and demoralizing to others. So if you want to be a person who others want to work with or for, keep your grumbling to a limit.
Contact us to learn how our experienced coaches can help you to be a great person to work with.
Jay Desko is the President & CEO of The Center Consulting Group and brings experience in the areas of organizational assessment, leadership coaching, decision-making, and strategic questioning. Jay’s degrees include an M.Ed. in Instructional Systems Design from Pennsylvania State University and a Ph.D. in Organizational Behavior and Leadership from The Union Institute.
